Wednesday, August 27, 2008

It Makes Me A Little Sad....

You might have heard of Kira Plastinina, the 16-year-old daughter of a Russian orange juice mogul (I'm not making this up) who has started her own eponymous chain store. Most everything I've heard of her so far has been applauding the fact that's so young and has her own store—the entrepreneurial spirit she must have! The ambition it must take to design a full line clothing at such a young age! And to decide to make it affordably priced so those unfortunates who aren't billionaires can have the clothes too! So I thought it would be a good idea to take a look at some of the clothes on her site. To say I was disappointed was an understatement, and my hopes hadn't even been set that high by what I'd already seen. Though, what did I expect from a girl my age who likes Hilary Duff and claims Paris Hilton as a role model. I can't imagine a single teen with half a bud of taste wearing any of this stuff and as I have learned from fashion blogging, some teenagers are actually quite stylish and would be able to design things 1000000x better. Here's a sampling of what Kira has to offer.

This monstrosity is for "when you can’t decide on a print tee, a swooping v-neck, or a hoodie—this top saves you from the pressure of early morning decision-making". It also saves you from the pressure of trying to look cheap—there's no effort involved here!

Shall I even began to enumerate the things wrong with this? To avoid stating the obvious, pockets in that area never work. Even the model is disgusted.

It doesn't work. It's like a balloon and an oversized softball shirt mated and had a baby which decided to call itself a dress. I won't even get into the random hood....

Ah, yes! This was just what was missing from my wardrobe! It brings "serious style to the all too regular hoodie". Yes. Wet Seal called. They want their archive piece from 2003 back.

Let's get things straight. I like this. I want this. But this thing... tramples the boundaries of taste and not in a good, innovative way.

These do not ever flatter the model. Enough said.

The really sad thing is that I would actually wear these if they weren't in a cheap-looking shiny fabric. That totally ruins them.

This is the "Punk Rock Princess" skirt. I'm not even going to get into that oxymoron, but again the only thing I can say is cheap.

Beating the dead horse, but these are odd and ugly and not in a good way like dropped crotch pants. I can't picture anyone wearing them unironically.


I'm not trying to be mean, and, if by some crazy chance Kira reads this, I'm not insulting you. I'm simply more than annoyed that just because your father is incredibly wealthy you get to make your own tacky store with what are in my own opinion extremely ugly clothes. Write me off as just being jealous that I can't have my own stores, okay? You have had all of this handed to you on a dainty little platter as you sit on your velour princess chair. Or private jet. There are so many more talented unknown designers who could use the money being wasted in opening 32 American stores. I'm putting all my faith in the American people that no one will buy this.

30 comments:

Nice and Shiny said...

Yeah I've heard of that girl, but I forgot to check out the clothes. Your right, it's all nasty! Obviously her money is the only thing that was going for her when she started her buisness.

sunset said...

Eeek. Like any of this stuff is original, really.. if it is, it's just original on a new level of suckage. What people think they can do with money...

Hanna said...

Russian girls can be very tacky. Don't get me started on my cousins. Once I saw a picture of her in a magazine wearing fuschia lipgloss, blonde highlights and ruffled micromini, I figured she wasn't the next Marc Jacobs.

Little Miss Dress Up said...

yeah i heard about this!! never saw actually pictures until now... it really is incredibly tacky!!!

ivy said...

I totally agree!

Cupcakes and Cashmere said...

great story, but i totally agree with you.

the Launderette said...

Not gonna lie...I like the shiny gold, pink, and silver jacket. I agree with you and don't like the other stuff, but I also don't like the clothes of a lot of well known older designers. I think the point of being a designer is making stuff you like. I think she's young and probably just wanted to make fun stuff that she liked and that would appeal to other girls with similar tastes to herself.

emily said...

omg wtf. this is disgusting.

yoncto said...

i agree. seriously, how much money did her father pay teen vogue and all the other magazines to endorse her like that? i have seen some of her sketches and she does actually have a good talent for DRAWING, but the stuff she designs is just pure fug.

Squishybubble said...

Ewww....that sucks! -vomits-

Stevie K. said...

I kinda like the shiny jacket so shoot me. But otherwise it looks like it should be sold at WalMart. Fuglyyy

cuteygrl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
pencilcrayons said...

aaaamen.

NYCynicist said...

Oh how i whole-heartedly agree!

Unfortunately, Americans are buying it - my roomate just bought one of her hideously tacky cut out tube tops...so sad.

-Amy

THE HOUSE OF STYLE said...

great great post and great critiques of each design.
x
marian

kristen.jeanne said...

oh my gosh i totally agree! i remember hearing about her and then looking at her site and thinking the exact same thing as you said in this post! its totally unfair that just because she has money she can have her own chain and get the ammount of attention she is getting!

mmmmeaghan. said...

hahahahhah that punk rock princess skirt just ... brightens my day. i want to wear it with a mini hoodie and a tiny purse, and like a huge plastic charm bracelet or something. and one of those tank tops with the lace on the bottom. ohh, the children.

LCL said...

yes! i was just about to do a post about this and you literally have like all the pictures i was going to use as well.

i am so jealous that she 1. gets gallons of orange juice for free and 2. designs and has her line produced, even if most of it is tacky and Russian.

blegh. nice post.

Cheyenne said...

hahaha funny. I remember seing this in teen vouge and thinking what the heck?!? Thank you for the awesome post

Dapper Kid said...

Euuuurgh, I would design things free for her just to stop this!!

Vi said...

I wouldn't wear any of those things. Anyone who buys any of these clothes are either extremely creative to where they can make it look decent, or just plain tacky.

Claire said...

Ugh, it's gross...I was going to do a post on her, but you beat me to it :) I wonder how much money her dad had to shell out to get her those endorsement deals?

Isa Han said...

Yes ! I read about her a while back in Teen Vogue. I completely agree with everything you are saying. And I read somewhere that JoJo likes her stuff....That is a bad sign...no offense

Isabel said...

Haha, I thought this post was hilarious. These clothes... they are pretty heinous!!!!!

Liam Walds said...

Ew... who would wear crap like this? Like, I'm not even that into fashion, but even I can tell this stuff is crap. That jacket with the silvery front? WTF???

WendyB said...

Ugly, ugly, ugly!

Tavi said...

EW. I know, I saw an endorsement for her in Teen Vogue and I was like "...how did this happen?" and thought of the lovely bloggers her age that could do 20 billion times better. You described it perfectly though :) ahh you crack me up!

EM said...

OOOOH dear lord.
the only thing i like about her, is the fact she included a photobooth in her stores..but...yow.

rorabear said...

okay her designs are fantastically awful but you should see how she has decorated her stores.
it's like the color pink upchucked all over the place and then the tacky fairy came in a tried to mop it up with faux fur and velour.
makes me want to cry and run away.

Lucy said...

I've seen her designs featured everywhere...didn't like her designs from the start. They're all just so cheap looking...